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A Chinese Saga

Professor Nanxi Cao - 11/14/2011

In China today, the most important thing for a family to gain in life is a home, actually a flat in a tall, common-looking residential tower. These towers are found in residential complexes, too numerous to count, often impersonal, where people bury themselves and rarely speak to their neighbors for at least one or two years before acknowledging them, unfortunately.

The buildings all look the same and are basically the same, not encouraging, often lacking of the wonderful traditional traces of architecture of the past. The tradition is that this home is purchased by the children, either alone or with the aid of the family, to house and care for their aging parents, for whom they are legally by the Constitution of the People’s Republic of China, and themselves. If they do not do this, the children must pay the rent for their parents and most of their basic living expenses anyways, food, clothing, and health care. To not do so is criminal, and the children can be prosecuted, possibly imprisoned for refusing to do so. It is a unique and interesting situation, which is changing due to the realization that this almost impossible in today’s world. (One person cannot be expected to support one’s own family and two elderly people financially and emotionally indefinitely. It is a terrible strain for one person to bear.)

About seven or eight years ago, our oldest son found a large residential area being built near a golf course, away from the pollution of the crowded areas in Daxing, trees and greenery abounding. (I have severe allergies and hate golf besides.) It was touted as being a spacious new community. He and his wife, along with his brother and us, went to see this place. The mock up display was lovely, of course, full of promises. (Mind you that there is no bus service, only a subway, few taxis, no supermarkets or medicine shops, no playgrounds for the children, or any other community services around for miles. If one does not drive or own a car, it is a nightmare to have to walk a long distance from one’s home to the subway to Beijing, a long distance from there.) At the time, he signed a contract for a spacious two-story condominium. It was supposed to be completed and ready within one year. One year came and passed; two years came and passed. Each time the developer had another excuse. Nothing for years was heard about this home, on which a down payment had already been placed. I do not know why they did not do something about this much earlier.

At last, needing to make a better living and hoping to find a better atmosphere and home, they left for South China to work, leaving his father to take over the matter in his stead. My son did well, having his own company. However, the climate was not good, having no public heating during the bitter cold of the wintertime in the mountains of Hunan and always raining. He soon realized that this would not be a good climate to bring his parents to live as they grow older. He decided to return to Beijing, to abandon his business, and to start over and return to the place where his parents and other family members remained. It was the right move as my granddaughter will attend better schools here and learn more for her future success in the growing global world. He is now here, still preparing to bring his family back, to arrange for school for his daughter. Why? We still do not have this house after eight years of waiting, the money being literally held ransom and refused to be returned 11 times now. The developer is a master at deception and thievery.

During this time, my husband and I were asked to take over and see what was truly going on. We made the discovery that this home had been sold to someone else in the meantime after trying in vain to see the home ourselves. We then later attended the first large meeting in ages, only to be insulted because of my white face and my husband’s becoming a dual nationality by marriage, quite literally in essence. Our son and his family were also derided for leaving and never having Beijing residence, being born in North China, his wife in Hunan. Where one is born is of the utmost importance in China in matters of housing and basic services, but changing. My husband is afraid of no one and spoke out, telling this man what he had discovered recently. He asked this man why there was no house after seven years. The developer had a battery of flunkies and lawyers with him to fend off this question and others asked by other families, people also had made their down payments still waiting. Mind you, this man had made no attempt to contact any of the families in all this time, the families being told that all was well and to wait by his office. Later, a committee was at last, far too late to be effective to try to get these contracted homes that have lain fallow for over ten years now.

I was asked to help and to see what I could do about this. I tried earnestly to help them, even going to my embassy and seeking assistance in this matter. I was referred to a wonderful Chinese lawyer, also educated in the United States, who said that he could get the house on our behalf, being well versed in solving such controversies and very savvy, being able to think in both cultures. However, he felt deep down that the money should be withdrawn since this was a ridiculous situation, not uncommon at that time. My husband chose to fight, and now regrets this decision sorely. This man was also very expensive. We searched for other competent lawyers, the group wanting bargain basement prices. They eventually did find charging a mid-range fee, who has worked hard and tirelessly to get this solved, still not being solved at this time, eight years now..

There have been 11 judgments granting the house to these families, overturned each time by this man’s paying off officials in the past. With the change in the legal system and new laws protecting consumers, the government has stepped in and ordered this man to prison soon. The courts are simply worn down and tired of this mess. There is no house; he has no money to finish these homes, water, electricity, internet, elevator service, etc. Today, my husband was once again given papers to sign on our son’s behalf, his having no legal power of attorney by the way, which makes all of this nonsense illegal in the first place, in my view, to seek a yes answer once again. I have never in my entire life ever seen or heard of such a thing. The contract is as good as toilet paper, even if the courts say it is valid.

I try to stay calm and not explode at the stupidity of this entire situation. I am now to the point where I do not allow these people to call our home, to come here, not attending any dinners (meetings, where they cook up more things to impede progress), and speaking with our lawyer when there is something going on and when to come to the courts or his office. It is most difficult to deal with these stupid, revenge-driven idiots, who cannot think with their minds, only their emotions, always revenge and anger. It is largely their fault that this is not done yet. They make this man angrier with each new desire they think up. It will never end, and if it does; the house will be so old that it will not be worth the money demanded for the home.

Many of these people do understand basic English for the most part, my understanding enough to speak with people using both Chinese and English; but they choose to never speak to me in English, pretending to not understand, not even trying to be friendly with even my husband unless they want something from him because he is an excellent advocate and speaker. He is highly analytical and calm in the face of fire. This is a very lonely and sad situation for me, in particular, since I will be living in a prison-like environment, with no one to talk to and be friends with. I am a Chinese wife and the matriarch of the family. I have to go and obey, making the best of it, which I will. I just wonder when—five more years, ten more years?

I do have my work and work from home, so it does not matter in reality where I work from. I concentrate on my work exclusively and not them or this situation. I have too much to do to take the time to be distracted by their nonsense. The core group members are primarily crazed, revenge-seeking old people. I fail to understand their mentality. Most sensible Chinese know better to indulge in this sort of behaviour. Even my husband thinks they are rather foolish at this point; but he is loyal to them nonetheless. They need him; and it feeds his ego to be needed for his leadership and communication abilities. When this is one day all over, the whole lot of them will be deflated and not know what to do with themselves in reality. My husband is a highly gifted professional traditional Chinese painter, so he will be not be lacking in finding solace in his intellectual persuits. We also will be teaching our granddaughters and tutoring them so that they can attend university in about eight or so years. They both must speak and understand both English well. I am responsible for teaching them to speak, write, and read English, my being a professor of English, now retired, a writer, a researcher, and an English editor. Their grandfather will be responsible for teaching them the sciences, mathematics, Chinese studies, and the arts. He is a retired biology professor by profession and also a librarian for many years. I do believe that we have much to do in the future.

I wonder where this strange saga will take them. No one will ever win this one. Everyone has lost already, but too pig-headed to admit it, only wanting revenge. If they get the house, I fear that this man will make sure that prior to finishing he will make it substandard in punishment of this fiasco, costing the homeowners more in the future to make it right later themselves. Logic is not even looked at here. The only logical solution is to take the money back, with interest as granted by the courts, find another home, and make the said purchase. It is so simple, but no one wants to hear it. It is a game of sorts to them in many ways. Such folly!

This is a true tale of futility. I have developed a sense of humor about this and these people, most of the time. It helps, as being angry is always here. Anger is fueling the stagnation of the ultimate need and goal here for all concerned. This is a good lesson to be learned by all, but I doubt it will teach them anything. They think they are being Western and modern here, which is even more amusing

There is a saying we have in West Virginia that goes:

Fool me once, shame on you.
Fool me twice, shame on me.

After the second time, no respectable person should remain to be so tortured and abused. Humanity stinks sometimes.